I don’t want to see the world, I want to hide from it. If I choose to leave it is because everyone around us is so horrifyingly awful, creating environments that are so unbearable, and because we are continuously unable to come to a non-selfish solution. I am selfish too, so I don’t know what I would do better or differently. It may be too easy to just pack up and go, but in the end even the journey can be completely meaningless. I continue to make up spaces to be happy because I have nothing else to fill that gap because nothing can. and other people just remind me of that awful truth and make it worse.
losing my mind, losing my grip.